Thoughts can’t stop running through my mind. What is it that I truly want to achieve in this lifetime?
Realizing that I don’t have much time now, this is the prime and I should be at my peak. But honestly, I’m not happy with what I am now. I don’t even know what I’m doing.
Missing you every single moment till we see each other again. Dating in another place you call home for now.
Current location: further from home yet not any nearer to you.
The bustle of the city roads, that Chinese man standing there waiting for us to load our bags, hurriedly, I handed my bag over and boarded the bus. Engine starts revving and the vehicle gave a hard shake before we start moving. Chatters going on around me, whispers and laughters. A few of them simply plugged in their earphones and faded into a world of their own. As I look out the window, I wondered, so this is Shanghai… What exactly is significant that I will remember how it looks like or that I have actually been here before? I knew nothing about this place. I was prepared to come to work, have a proper rest at least and head back home for a warm dinner with the family.
Hearing about the plans of others tempted me a little. But I have my notes to read, I shall not be wavered.
Life, is simply not simple. I have difficulties understanding why and how some people behave despite knowing the consequences. And sometimes, one simply do not have any control even if it is the emotions within oneself.
It is thought that I should feel and behave positively to attract the positive energy in life. However, the more I try to pump this joy, the more things tend to backfire. When I take a slightly more neutral stance, I am treated better in return. Or is there another saying that goes: “expectations lead to disappointment.”
Crying my night away is not a solution. But it does bring me to another state of mind where I think I’m okay for now. Will also come to realize that actually my time has passed so much that I may actually not get sufficient rest for work the following day.
I miss you more than ever.
Sometimes having a routine beats receiving abrupt news that will break the hopes of having an off day the following day.
My commute to work is expensive and mind twisting sometimes.
I will expect everyone to be nice then they will just turn out like pieces of crap and psychotic bloke. What irks me the most is how I have to pretend to be all nice and quiet, waiting to be devoured like a little lamb. Trust me. I’ve decided. I’ll no longer try so hard. What’s the point at the end of the day? Just to make you happy while I’m not. What’s the point, exactly? I didn’t sign up for this. Surely I wasn’t born or made to do this at all.
I really can’t wait to see you. I think of you all the time. The smell of you on my pillow puts me at ease. I turn around and realize that you’re not here now to share my night with me. The time difference is so wide that we have difficulties catching each other. Nothing is the same.
I miss my holiday.
Hearing the sound of bells chiming, the melody that accompanies it, brings out the loneliest soul within me tonight.
Watch them tear you apart, only to realize that they are merely polishing the surface of you, making you a better gem at the end of the journey. Every now and then I get that question whether I am liking it or getting used to. -
and just as i was getting into the mood to write a long entry, a stupid phone call has to come and disturb my peace. WTH is wrong with them?! trying to make me overwork or what? This is the number one hate I am experiencing with them.
I am so freaking annoyed now and I just can’t do anything about it. WHAT A LIFE.
Never really thought that we share such strong bonds till distance separates us and makes me want to have you even more than I already do. And also how you tell me you miss me like no other times.
Having known that I have been assigned to a place near you, I feel like it is the best assignment so far. Somehow hoping that what I have in mind could be executed and lived.
My life and yours, will be forever changed. ❤️
Buy those cheese, try some weed… Nah, i’m kidding.
I have a feeling this shall be the last Amsterdam I’m seeing till some time later. It seems to be like that for my Seoul trip too. Twice within a short period of time and then *pom,* never see it anymore.
Having lost that poetry touch in life, I have to seize every conducive environment to do so. Now, even my fingers are stiff to the feel of typing on the keyboard. It shouldn’t be the case of cold fingers ‘cuz I’ve clearly not been typing for god knows how many days, months, years…
I’m excited yet sad about the fact that the D-boy is leaving our little red dot to the Great Britain.
For One; I shall see the less of him.
For Two; off days are more like rest days during layovers.
For Three; Awkwardness of being with the “importants” alone without him.
I miss him already, even on short trips, moreover extended ones. Please give me more of what I need, not want. Thank you very much.
I seemed to have lost count of what I have not posted simply because I can’t. Like the last Frankfurt and Haneda, Japan. Will will try to. ASAP.